more random thoughts and run on sentences and mis used punctuation

With so much on my mind pertaining to RAAM it is easy to forget what fuels me beyond my impending goals.

This bike race called RAAM has been on my mind for about the past 2 years and really on my mind since last July – and now we are 30 days or less away. I have been thinking a ton about what makes me want to pursue things beyond my comprehension…and really…RAAM is amazing but more so on the solo end so I don’t want to get ahead of myself here..but all the same…this is huge – for me.

I hesitated the other day when I was consumed with all things about bikes, this race etc…was this race a defining moment in my life? Was this going to be it? Did I have plans for anything else as spectacular? I was almost ashamed to even have to think about this one…of course not. Each day my eyes open in the morning – slower on some days – my family is the reminder that all I do is worthy of my best effort and that my family is a continual defining moment of joy.
I have been through some rather scary moments in life as a husband/father in the past few years – questioning my resolve to the core. We have had times of complete failure when we had nothing further to loose. My family has been steadfast to support me as a husband and father without question through these times – scared and hopeful. So I guess today I am reminded that RAAM is not a part of my life that finishes who I am but builds it further but as a father and husband – these…these things will last as a reminder of why we get up…get out…and then live.
So in a weird way – I want to give this race to my family as they have given up so much to have me prepare for this journey. I cant imagine my life without the ones I love and to have them with me in spirit on this ride is going to be a defining moment in life for me…the race…icing on the cake.

So in looking back on time and troubles, worries and fears, failures and victories…the only constant has been God and my family…with these two wonderful, amazing and solid pillars in my life I see that life is now opening up even more…and I am able to see that life has always been a wide open book in the past…its just my inability to see the past that casts a shroud on the present.

We have so much in the small places of life…RAAM has allowed me to see these places with clarity and I haven’t even started the race yet…

Time to roll out and get back to work.

Andrew